Recently, I marked my …birthday (you can fill in the gap). The lessons from physics class of yesteryear now make sense to me – just like one of those moments you exclaim aha!, according to Oprah. Topping the list of my enemies is the force of gravity.
In the recent time, a one-of-its-kind and unprovoked attack has risen up from gravity against me. Don’t get me wrong, this has got nothing to do with one random object descending on me. My body is the object as well as the target! How come I have now assumed a sprawling and stooping posture as my natural postures – as though my petite size and height are not enough limitations on its own?
You may think I have stopped loving and going out to dance, no. It’s my heart beat. Just recently, it took me just a swift move to get down and back up. I could shake it as long as possible, without missing any of the DJ’s lead – but right now. My muscles would screech at the DJ’s ‘Get Low’ instruction. If I go contrary, I’m staying down…the laws of gravity would not even delay a moment longer to oblige.
This force of gravity also wrestles against beauty. My mature mind keeps saying beauty is a thing of the soul – but I wonder why my eyes and skin are stylishly lining Cover Girl and Olay shareholders wallet if truly the beauty is a thing of the soul.
Fellow ladies, you are in this with me, or are you pretending not to know what I’m talking about? Okay, you want me to describe the scene? There you are at CVS or Walgreens getting a prescription, then you drift towards the beauty product’s section to pick the Olay Regenerist, to replace the one you used up (you’ve been using up a lot of those recently in such alarming rate, isn’t it?).
As if the Olay Regenerist is not enough, you drift again to the section where your eyes caught a ‘sample’ night cream and also added it to your shopping cart. You are not even sure whether this one would work better than the previous. Not able to shake off the thought of those irritating FDA standards all the while.
You can’t still find Botox (the Clostridium botulinum-produced bacterium) over the counter – perhaps you may contact Barack and enquire if the health-care bill would cover this toxic migraine medication). Now girlfriends, let’s be bold in speaking about the twins. Perhaps you must have noticed that not quite too long, the grapefruit shapes, they held were almost perfect – but presently, (in the absence of your permission – shameful as it is), the shape now takes on the squash which is also the zucchinis – pause and ponder on that a while.
Okay, it could be that a good number of you are/were breastfeeding, but what excuse applies to others? It’s really disappointing that a magnetic force has conquered the twins’ gravity-defying power, a signal to a waistline race.
Credit : PinkStock
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